By request, a Strategic Sorcery style Global Ritual. Printable version here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Z36Ny805fFuqcGxEi3EMHlTwqkGxnv8Q9LhWIYg1UBc/edit?fbclid=IwAR2dT-OlZAlFRkQL5FGvlzbF_psf1w-suOQvGL9Qp3b9-2GRjQ_L0Mq_pMI
Instructions
This ritual is best performed between Dec 5th and Christmas. However, the ritual can performed whenever you want. The rite can be adapted for your own use.
Necessary Tools
- A single-sided paper printout of this ritual (save it as a talisman)
- 2 candles; dark green and “forest” scented is ideal.
- Buttered bread with honey. The shiniest, prettiest, darkest red apple you can find. If you were poisoning Snow White, what kind of apple would you want? Pick that one.
- Red Wine, Dark Beer, Apple Cider, or WHOLE (ie, full fat) Milk (skim milk is worse than nothing)
- A small pile of coins. Gold Sacagawea dollars are especially nice for this. You will NOT get your coins back.
Optional Tools
- Mask
- Antlers / Horns
- Evergreen boughs
- Staff or Stick (Birch is best. Almost anything will do, except Holly. Pine is not ideal.)
- Ivy crown
- A feast. Roast a whole goat on a spit!
- Friends / co-Magicians
- Breakable chains
Before Beginning
- Spend some time collecting your thoughts, and reviewing the year that is ending.
- Think of times you’ve been very generous.
- Think of times you’ve been fully sincere.
- Think of times you’ve been very peaceful.
- Think of times you’ve been very brave.
- Think about things that have been holding you back; chains you’d like to be freed from. Write them on the last page.
Opening
Begone Crass Commercial Ploy!
Begone Sanctimonious Spoiler!
Begone Santa! Begone Christ!
Begone Santa! Begone Christ!
Welcome to the Sylvan Knotty!
Goodbye to the Saccharine Nice!
Bang your stick three times. (or stamp your feet)
I bless this sacred glade, set apart in Time and Space.
The Forest Primeval weaves a fairy ring around me,
where Wood and Spirits embrace.
Now is EveryWhen.
Light the candles.
Call
Perchta! White Cloaked Lady of the Winter Wood!
Goosefooted Goddess of Snow and Frost!
Rewarder of Magnanimity! Punisher of Greed!
Rewarder of Sincerity! Punisher of Thieves!
Dark Winter Queen,
Come to me! Be with me!
Inspire me! Bless me!
Krampus! Ram-Horned Lord of the Winter Wood!
Goat-legged God of Ivy and Birch!
Rewarder of Carelessness! Punisher of Heed!
Rewarder of Bravery! Punisher of Misdeed!
Light Winter King,
Come to me! Be with me!
Inspire me! Bless me!
Wicked Wild Winter Wood, Whispering Winds and Wandering Ways,
Weave your Web of Wondrous Wyrd!
Goblins, Boggins, Hobs, and Sprites; woodland Puck, and spring heeled Jack,
Come and join our Saturnalian feast!
The reward for heroic slack!
Pour drink. Pour honey over bread
Chant
Drum a steady beat with your stick.
Perchta, Krampus, Wild Wood,
Winter Queen and King.
Repeat the chant until you feel overtaken by you inner Wyld.
You may find your tempo and volume increasing to a frenzied crescendo.
ExStasis
Offerings
Perchta, I am generous! (cite an example of your generosity)
Perchta, I am sincere! (cite an example of your sincerity)
Bless me with wealth and health and all good things.
Make me an instrument of inspiration!
Krampus, I am at peace! (cite an example of your peaceable ways)
Krampus, I am brave! (cite and example of your bravery)
Bless me with clarity and tranquility and all good things.
Make me an instrument of inspiration!
Bless these coins, so that they may spread your generosity, peace, and inspiration.
Bless these coins, so that they may spread your generosity, peace, and inspiration.
Wicked Wild Winter Wood!
I free you from your chains!
Wicked Wild Winter Wood!
Free me from my chains!
Burn the last page of this pamphlet
Euoi!
Euoi!
Euoi!
Denouement
Laugh, sing, dance, and cavort until you no longer can. This is not optional.
Before New Years, give the coins away to beggars, or leave them where someone in need will find them. Do not give them to an organized charity - give directly to someone in need. Especially DO NOT, under put them in a Salvation Army kettle, or any other collection related to Jesus or Santa. This is not optional.
Place the offerings out in the woods. If you have no woods near you, choose the most wild place that you can find. This is not optional.
Place the offerings out in the woods. If you have no woods near you, choose the most wild place that you can find. This is not optional.
The Thirteen Nights of Krampusmas
On the 13th night of Krampusmas
the Old Claw ordered we...
13) Fight against the dark god,
12) Prepare ourselves for battle,
11) Dance with maenad ladies,
10) Liberate the slave elves,
9) Escape from the Pale Warden,
8) Give unto the needy,
7) Love the strangest stranger,
6) Join our hearts and voices-
5) STOP. BUYING. THINGS.
4) Seek the Mysteries,
3) Run through the forest,
2) Declaring all our loves,
- While cosplaying the Krampus Army.
